The Sentinel

Issue date: 10/14/09 Section: Commentary

Drinking, smoking, and swearing are the cornerstones of my greatest pastimes. Unfortunately, my happiness is consistently being compromised by do-gooders representing the public-at-large. I am offended by their imposition of ideals, "health and progressive advancement" on us all. I have one mother already (who I love dearly), but I fully deny the need for 535 more of them in Congress to lecture me on my own vices.

Last spring the OSU Lantern released results of their Global Warming Student Survey claiming: "Students think global warming happening, is more important than strong economy." Of the 35,719 full-time undergraduate students at OSU, only 3,568 responded. We think a more appropriate headline for the article should have been "Only 9.9% of OSU Students Care Enough About Global Warming To Fill Out Our Stupid Survey."

John Boehner is an asshole. As House Minority Leader he is blunt, offensive, and always either drinking or drunk. He called the President a "chicken shit" for voting present while a senator, and has been the "most unpopular politician in the US" for some time now. I salute you John Boehner, you may be an asshole, but you're a great asshole.

President Obama was caught again making an incendiary comment off the record. Not about the Special Olympics, but about Kanye West. Obama called West a "Jackass" after his award show mockery. One has to wonder, perhaps this is the white half of Obama who "everybody knows doesn't care about black people."

Bill Maher, host of the "Real Time with Bill Maher" show on HBO, called America a "stupid country" over the summer. When given a second chance by CNN's Wolf Blitzer to clarify his comments (because surely he didn't mean that), Maher doubled down and said that indeed this is a stupid country because people still like Sara Palin. The truth is Bill Maher is acting like a child that can't get a piece of candy. The American people don't want the government making their healthcare choices for them, so therefore they must be 'stupid' for their own self-reliance... plus they're all racists.

On the same note... during the Bush years, dissent against the government was the highest form of patriotism. During the Obama years, dissent against the government is the lowest form of racism. Fact: It is possible to disagree with the President because of deeply held philosophical differences, and not because he is a "black man in the White House."

Michael Moore's latest flop, err film, will essentially boil down to "capitalism is evil." Very true Michael. Therefore you should follow your social justice / communist ideology and give up the millions of dollars you have made from misrepresenting the facts and marketing childish liberal bullshit. You should make the individual DVDs yourself and give them away for free. And while you're at it, since capitalism is so evil, your fans should give up their TV sets and DVD players that were designed in Japan, built in Korea and shipped across half the planet without any central planning or government direction. Why not give up your clothes Michael? Since they too were designed, stitched, and tailored in a free market system of supply, demand, and profits. Then again, keep your shirt on Moore, nobody wants to see what you've got going on under there.

Page 1 of 1

Article Tools